Just Sitting Here, Playing Live, Parts 1 & 2

Part One: Burn Victim Night Terrors



I've been playing NBA Live since 1998, when Tim Hardaway was on the cover. It was back in the day when computer games were packaged in huge cereal-sized boxes, and screen shots bubbled out to showcase the 3-D graphics. I specifically remember Allen Iverson hitting a leaner over a nameless whitey, while Mitch Richmond hoisted a fade away. Most importantly, I recall being jazzed about the graphics, Charles Barkley's face in particular. This was an era of graphics when players had scarecrow bodies and bulbous heads shaped like octahedron. To personalize the athletes, portraits were stretched over each head, and the resulting look was predominantly "burn victim." If you played sports games 12 or 13 years ago, you remember the burn victim era. It haunted me. Hockey games played a big part, and Ray Bourque was the worst. I had many night terrors about burn victim Ray Bourque. He'd skate over my fingers with his cruel and demented scarecrow legs. I did everything I could to cheer him up, but nothing could deter his steely focus. Every night Ray Bourque would appear, and every night he was burnt and angry.

In any case, the reverse side of the box looked promising. Charles' smooth, round, pot roast head was carefully polished, and more importantly, Mitch Richmond was shooting a fade away. Before Live '98, it was apple pie, and Steve Kerr jumpers that resembled set shots. It doesn't seem like a big deal, but when MJ is the dominant player in the game and you can't execute his signature move, it's like having access to a perfect set of tits with missing nipples.

Part Two: The Greatest Live Roster Ever Assembled

The best part of this game, hands down, was the Los Angeles Lakers. They've been my favorite team since Nick Van Exel, Eddie Jones, and Cedric Ceballos ran the show. In '97-'98, they were terrible in the playoffs, (they got swept by Utah) but they had the deepest, most talented video basketball team I can ever remember. If I had to choose any previous NBA Live roster in a duel to the death, I would select the Live '98 Lakers in a split second. Please challenge me. I'll buy salted snacks and soda. We can even recreate the roster on 2K10 if you want, since Live stinks now anyways. Get a load of this roster. They're still my favorite Lakers team, and this video clip is 3 minutes of pure basketball power that shouldn't be missed. Wow.




C- Shaquille O'Neal
The most dominant player of his era. Hands down. I refuse to argue about this. Watch this video. Please watch it, until 3:40 anyways. Everyone forgets how agile he was. Everyone forgets about his devastating drop-step spin move. Everyone forgets about his surprisingly soft touch on the inside. He had that subtle little baby hook to rely on when he was fatigued, and an elusive turn-around towards the middle of the paint when he was sucking wind. Everyone is so anxious to call Dwight Howard the next Shaq, but they forget Shaq's historic bulldoze to three straight Finals MVPs, and how he averaged nearly 30 and 20 in the first two. It was a reign of absolute terror. I don't ever recall Dwight Howard handling the ball on the fast break and closing it out with a perfect alley-oop, or twirling through a ginger little spin move and capping it with a two-handed thunder dunk over the opposing center. No other center could handle the rock like Shaq on the fast break, no one.



PF- Elden Campbell At the time, he was a very solid power forward/center. The previous season, he averaged a 17-9 to carry the Lakers during one of Shaq's classic mid-season hiatus'. This short 20 game explosion during '96-'97 led to an inflated 76-80 rating for Live '98. Not to mention, he was an absolute rebounding machine in this game. He was such a beast that I had to freeze him out for long periods of time. He was hogging all of Shaq's big man stats. Averaged 10-6 and 1 block that year playing just 22 minutes a game.

SF- Rick Fox Over the years, he grew a long slick mane and slowly transformed into a basketball guido, but at the time, his fade was in check and he was still cool, I swear. He was just a year removed from his reign as captain of the Boston Celtics, albeit a shitty honor, considering his next best teammates were Dana Barros and Dino Radja. But fuck, they acquired the Celtics' best guy and slid him in as their sixth best player, which has got to count for something. His last season with the Celtics he averaged a 15-5-4, with 2.2 steals. Plus I thought he was cool because he was the only Canadian player around at that time. Uncle Bill Wennington does not count, and Steve Nash looked like this.



SG- Eddie Jones One of my top 5 favorite players ever. When they traded Eddie and Elden Campbell for Glen Rice, I nearly cried blood. He had the smoothest finger roll since George Gervin, a delicate jumper, and played the straight man in my favorite back court of all time. At the time his skills were more complete and rounded than a raw Kobe Bryant, whom Eddie mentored until he was dealt the next season. Eddie was an all-star that year, along with Shaq, Kobe, and Van Exel, and he may have been the most appreciated player at the Forum. I remember fans obsessively chanting "EDDIE EDDIE!" and exploding after more of his big threes, alley-oops, or hustle plays than anyone else that season. Remember, the following season he made the All-NBA third team, and showed up on All-Defensive teams nearly every year thereafter for quite some time. What a dreamboat. Watch him dunk on Shawn Bradley in his home town. Two times.



PG- Nick Van Exel One of my top 5 players of all time. He threw no-look alley-oops, shot ill-advised, back-breaking threes, (note the ill-advised threes could be just as back-breaking for the Lakers as the opposition) picked pockets, shot his mouth off, looked like a fresh womby fetus with a pencil mustache and played the selfish, loud-mouthed trouble maker in my favorite back court of all time. He was especially deadly from three-point land in this game, and I think his clutch rating was way too high, like a 99. Bonus points for looking like a villain from a Hana Barbara cartoon.



Parts 3, 4, and 5 on their way.